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Last weekend in Chelan was excellent; we ended up staying in a hotel in the soulless suburban sprawl of Wenatchee, about an hour south of Chelan. The fires left a haze and smell throughout Chelan; apparently Friday was bad enough to keep many indoors, but the air was clearing by the time we arrived on Saturday. We spent the day on the water and had a blast. Highlights include:

• A variety of mature challenges of extreme import, including who can dive the furthest and who can hurt themselves the most while attempting a flip (I won both).
• Jonah’s Beer Challenge Tubing Course: A full circle followed by a figure eight follow by a long straightaway with a hairpin turn. Survive and Jonah buys you a beer (Racher and I were victorious, Andy came very close)
• I tried water skiing for the first time; I wasn’t very good.
• Wenatchee is an illustration of why I hate American suburbs, more on that in another post.

We brought a case of expensive wine but forgot a corkscrew. Jonah, Andy, and I went out and bought a corkscrew but told everyone back at the hotel that we couldn’t find one since all the shops close by 10pm. The others were ready to push the cork in when Jonah said he’d go down to the reception and see if they could open it for us. He leaves the room, corkscrew in pocket, and returns a few minutes later with an open bottle of wine. He’s the hero of the night.

Each of us had a bottle to ourselves, so we sent Jonah down again with another bottle of wine. The others imagined the look on the hotel receptionist’s face as Jonah comes with bottle after bottle of wine to be opened. Once he returns with the next bottle, we send Martha down to open another.

Martha expects the receptionist to laugh because she’s being given yet another bottle of wine to open. Meanwhile, the receptionist has no idea what’s she talking about, doesn’t have a corkscrew and never did. Martha returns with an unopened bottle of wine, disapponited and disillusioned.

Let me work my charm, I tell her. Jonah passed me the corkscrew while no one was looking, so I come back with an open bottle of wine and a yarn about flirting skillfully enough to get the bottle opened. Then, I did a backflip and everyone cheered.

(You’ll just have to trust me that it was hilarious at the time; it didn’t translate well to text)